Awake at Stupid o'clock with no one to keep me company.

Future

LIFE PLAN: Open an ice cream shop. Call it The Yard. Specialize in milkshakes. (All the boys will come.)

Conversation from 2007 with Stranger

"Either your boyfriend, fiance, or your husband did something to really piss you off..."
-No. I'm just really tired.
"So you're just going to go home and go to bed?"
-Yeah..
"Well ok. What do you do for money?"
-I babysit.
"You babysit? Awesome. So are you still in school here?
-No. I'm in tenth grade.
"Are you serious? I thought you were 25."
-I'm fifteen.
"Oh gosh. I'm twice your age."
-And how does that make you feel?
"Pretty shitty, actually. Pretty, pretty shitty. I mean I saw you standing there. You're attractive. I mean you've got things going for you. And I'm thinking you are 23, 24, maybe 25... And here you are 15?"
-Yeah.I'm fifteen.



This is why I'm not going to Ole Miss.

want a strawberry?
-no thanks. i'm enjoying my coke and these things.
what things?
-you know... the things.
no mom. I don't know. what things are you talking about.
-the things that come with the coke.
mom. cokes dont come with anyting.
-yes they do! you know. THINGS. like fizziness. and happiness.
those are the things that come with cokes?
-yes. and i enjoy them.

i love my mother.

Hobo 1: "There isn't such a thing as ugly. You've been taught to believe what ugly is by television and the media, but it is ultimately a relation to how you see yourself. If you spend enough time on it, you realize that there really isn't such a thing..."

Hobo 2:"Or maybe you get drunk enough and have sex with a dead animal."


What an enchanting conversation. I love strangers.

Spending my birthday weekend at the lake.
But more importantly:
Spending my birthday weekend in the kitchen.

अ पूर्ली व्रित्तें ब्लॉग इन व्हिच इ कंप्लें फार तू मच फॉर माय ओवन गुड

(I will PAY anyone who can tell my why my blog titles are not in Enlglish.)


Run down of morning:
Wake up to 85 degree heat blowing on me. (Aside from having someone purposefully wake me up for no reason, waking up in a sweat is what pushes me into a fine frenzy.)I suppose roommate/temperature Nazi decided to stick it to me by upping the temperature a solid twenty degrees.

At the same time a loud voice comes on the intercom. "If yo phone don't have a label, please come see me to get a label fo yo phone. If yo phone don't have a label, please come see me to get a label fo yo phone." Not only is this woman waking me up for no reason, but she is also using poor grammar. (I would say I was fuming, but it's hard to fume hotter than 85 degrees.)

I venture downstairs to clock in and hand in my phone. Administration says my dress is too short. (I'm wearing shorts and leggings.If I wanted to be immodest, I'd just wear the dress.) Upon turning around, she calls me back.

"Either lengthen the shirt or lengthen the shorts."

(I am terribly tempted to tell her to lengthen the rules in the handbook, but I refrain. See, my dress was longer than arms length, but she wouldn't take it.)

So I run up the stairs. Change into jeans. And arrive late to class.
I'm not a happy camper.

However. I DID finish my paper. As in I finished it for good. Done. Over. No more.
I can rest easy.

I saw you from across the room in a very expected place
Talking to my parents as if they were your own.
I suppose it's because I view you as a brother.
And for so many months of my life, you were.

(But we were only actors)

I was surprised, really
To see you in a place where you once belonged
I followed you here only to find that you had moved off
Leaving me in this brave new world

(The last thing I heard was that you were a stripper in some gay bar)

You haven't changed at all
Granted, you're taller
And you have more memories now
But I'd say our relationship still the same

(and that's saying something)

I'm not trying to be vulgar, but the "lasagna" that was served for dinner looked like something that would exit the lower end of my body. I am famished. ::grumble/grumble::

I met Mr. Forward tonight. He was wearing sparkles.



me: how was the show tonight?

mr. forward: eh. better than last night. the audience was totally dead though.

me: well the audience is always dead the first night.

mr. forward: yeah. so you wanna make out?

me: ...

"I didn't know the Bible was the best..most..uhh..TOP selling book in the world. That just goes to show how great God is. Amen....(babble babble babble)"


PUH-LEASE!

Jesus belongs in my heart. NOT SHOVED DOWN MY THROAT.

किंग James

I'm watching someone give a powerpoint.
I'm just going to be blunt here.
It sucks.

I give her credit for trying.
But I take the credit back for trying too hard.

I think she has broken every rule possible.


That is all.

तेच-नो

Blog titles are in a foreign language again.
This should be called "Tech-NO"


The only lasting relationship I have ever been able to maintain happily is the relationship I have with my computer. This isn't necessarily a deep relationship: I don't know his past,and I certainly don't care to know about his internal problems. I live in harmony with my computer. He gives back on the exact level that I put in. We are perfect for each other. We've traveled the world together. He's introduced me to a countless number of people. He's the last thing I see before I go to bed.

Everything was great until the unthinkable happened. Last Monday, my lovely boyfriend developed a heart condition. And when his heart is broken, MY heart is broken. I don't know how to function without my Internet. (everyone knows the Internet is the heart of a computer.) One thing led to another led to another and a brain tumor was detected. I didn't even know my lovely boy was in the hospital. I found out by accident when I opened the doors and he was nowhere.

This morning, I went to the hospital to visit my poor baby, but before I could even see him, I was sternly greeted by his father, who happens to be his doctor as well. Father informed me that my lovely computer was in a coma, and he couldn't be saved. But because my boyfriend loves me and genuinely wants to look out for me, he held on long enough to have an organ transplant.

So I carry his insides in an ice chest (USB drive) around my neck. Outside appearances never mattered in our relationship, so I will search diligently until I find a new body. And once I do, I will arrange his organs in the exact location as his old home. Things will be normal again.

____________________________________________

Good gracious. Excuse that. Here's a summary: I had been working for months on a term parer. It was saved to one computer. The Internet on this computer broke. Then the hard drive crashed. Tech guy came in and took the computer on Friday, but ran out of time to do anything about it. He would have swiped its memory, but like I said, he ran out of time. Luckily, I found him this morning and we managed to save my files. He sighed a lot and grunted far too often for my liking, but it doesn't matter as long as I have my paper. And I do.

Hearing Voices

I'm sitting up in bed. Only 12:19 am. Stumbling through the world of blogs, (secretly, we all just want to be loved by a stranger) and I realize something slightly unsettling. I've communicated with so many people via this here Internet. I've read your blogs. I've seen your pictures. I know your child's name, and i know what you serve your husband for dinner.

But I've never heard any of these people's voice.
It's almost as though they are fiction.



I can't sleep. My ceiling fan is shaking the entire room, and every time I close my eyes, I relive the exact same scene.
I have an hour drive to make starting in six hours.

Call me to keep me company; heaven knows I can't make conversation with real people.

Tomorrow I will be playing live music on live television.
I am very nervous.

Church is not a cocktail party.